"Nu, Vos Hert Zich?" — The Art of Heimish Small Talk "נו, וואס הערט זיך?" — די קונסט פונעם היימישן שמועס

Two Yidden meet on the street. One says "Nu?" The other says "Nu!" The first nods, the second makes a hand gesture, and both are very satisfied with the conversation. For those not yet fluent in the language, we've put together a short guide.

The Opening

• Chasidish version: "Nu, vos hert zich?" ("Nu, what's new?"), "Vos macht a Yid?" ("How's a Yid doing?"), or simply "Nu, Reb Yid?"
• Litvish version: "Nu, what are you learning?", "Where are you holding?", or "How's the zman going?"
• Universal version: "Shalom aleichem!" — with a pat on the shoulder, which is a whole conversation in itself.

The Answers

Here lies the real art. You never answer "What's new?" with news. You answer with one of the classic phrases:

• "Baruch Hashem." — the answer to everything. Good? Baruch Hashem. Hard? Baruch Hashem. Not sure? Baruch Hashem.
• "Men lebt." ("One lives.") — meaning: everything's fine, but you don't want to invite an ayin hara.
• "Men shlept." ("One schleps.") — meaning: everything's fine, but you enjoy a good krechtz.
• "It could be better, it could be worse." — a philosophical answer, for late at night after mishmar.

The Litvish Conversation

Among Litvaks the conversation quickly turns to learning: "What are you holding in shiur?" "Bava Kamma." "Ah, a good masechta." "Yes." "Yes." — Here the conversation ends, and both are convinced they had a wonderful chat.

The Chasidish Conversation

Among Chasidim the conversation stretches: it starts with "vos hert zich," moves on to last Shabbos's tish, then to a neighbor's shalom zachor, and ends with "We need to get together sometime for a l'chaim!" — which works as a complete sentence. The l'chaim will happen when Moshiach comes.

The End

One thing is the same for both: to "Zeit gezunt" ("Be well") you answer "Zeit gezunt," and then you stand another ten minutes and keep talking. This is called a "heimish goodbye."

Because truly, when a Yid asks "Nu, vos hert zich?", he isn't asking for news. He's saying: "I care about you, and it matters to me how you're doing." And that is understood in every version.